Natasha Dosa
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Do you ever have that feeling there has gotta be more to life? As a christian I think use to believe I have the answer. You know…its Jesus. Jesus is the answer. And while that is 100% true, I don’t really act like it…and to be gut-level honest I don’t really know if I believe it or even want it. Jesus, God, heaven it all seems too far away and distant. I believe because I am supposed to; I believe because I want the promise of paradise one day. But what does Jesus have to do with my life now? How does He pay my bills, heal my heart after a break-up and make me feel alive? Jesus often just feels like a list of dos and donts scratched in permanent ink, a scripture verse cross-stitched in a chipped frame on my grandparents kitchen wall and unread dusty bible sitting on the top of my bedroom bookshelf. Jesus seems to only care if I mess up. He feels like the condemning eye of that preacher who found out I knocked up my girlfriend and blasted me in front of all my friends or that older aunt on facebook who only reposts articles about God hating homosexuals. All I want to do is click block and never walk into a church again. But somewhere deep down I know there is more. This can’t be who Jesus is, because I remember those stories from Sunday school. The ones about Him walking on water, healing sick little kids, making wine, giving sight to the blind and hearing to the deaf, commanding demons to leave the scene, and eating meals with all the rejects of society. He sounds like some kind of comic book super hero from the Marvel universe right?

And so I keep wondering if there is more to life? Even as I fail over and over again to live up to the rigid expectations of dos and donts. On the inside I feel myself screaming for life, for purpose and for meaning. And on the outside, I probably just look slightly cynically and apathetic. The church around me has been saying for decades, it’s not about religion, its about relationship, but I look around and no ones seems to be living this. What does that even mean? Read my bible more? Pray more? Go to church more? Everyone seems to care about my porn addiction, but no one seems to know how to help my heart.

There is hope. Jesus is more. He is near, He is not far away. He came to earth as a man, just like us. He experienced every broken part of this world as a man. He longs to speak to me, to comfort me, to inspire me and give me purpose beyond my wildest dreams. He wants to cover my shame and emptiness with His honor and with His fullness. All these hidden longings to bring justice to the world, those feelings of compassion to help the hurting, that ache to make a difference, to belong somewhere, Jesus created those inside of me. He wants to show me things about Himself I never even knew existed, never even knew possible. He wants to take me on adventures. He wants to show me His goodness and kindness. He wants me to be His hands and feet to the world around me who also long for meaning, purpose and life.

As the images and words rage every day on my news feeds as I endlessly scroll over the newest political scandal, teen suicide, high school shooting, terrorist attack and celebrity sex tape, my heart, my emotions and my thoughts feel numb. It’s so much. Yet, I know there is more. Jesus has more for me. I want Him to open my eyes and my ears. I want to understand that His way better, it’s not just about do’s and dont’s. I think this this is the key…knowing Jesus. If we truly know Him, we wouldn’t see that list of dos and don’ts, we would deeply long to just be near Him. And when you are near Jesus, wrong just becomes something you have no desire for and right just becomes everything that you want.. This is what Jesus does. He transforms our desires. He makes the impossible, possible.

What if you could discover more of Jesus than you ever could have imagined? A Discipleship Training School (DTS) with YWAM could be the opportunity for you to discover this. God is good, but do you want to believe it? Do you want to understand how? Do you want to do something that impacts the world for good? Take a chance and try a six month DTS where you will know God and then make Him known to the nations of the world. Don’t just wish there was more to life, found out that there is!


Learn more about DTS here!


Natasha Dosa

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